Vanessa Bryant is allowing herself to grieve, and sharing her thoughts on her tragic loss with the world. While she's posted to Instagram several times since the fatal accident that claimed the lives of Kobe and Gianna Bryant along with seven others, this is the first time she's been so candid about how she's feeling in the aftermath.

Bryant took to the social media platform today and made a post about her current emotional state, which she shared alongside a sepia-toned video of Gianna and Kobe on the basketball court at Mamba Sports Academy. "I’ve been reluctant to put my feelings into words," she said. "My brain refuses to accept that both Kobe and Gigi are gone. I can’t process both at the same time. It’s like I’m trying to process Kobe being gone but my body refuses to accept my Gigi will never come back to me. It feels wrong."

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Vanessa Laine Bryant, Kobe Bryant, Natalia Diamante Bryant, and Gianna Maria-Onore Bryant  at the world premiere of Disney's 'A Wrinkle in Time,' in Hollywood, California, 2018

Vanessa Bryant on loss of Kobe and Gianna: "I'm so mad"

Bryant's caption for her post reads like a stream of consciousness, allowing her thoughts to flow freely as she expresses her grief and anger towards her situation. "Why should I be able to wake up another day when my baby girl isn’t being able to have that opportunity?!" Bryant questions. "I’m so mad. She had so much life to live".

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She then goes on to say how while she's angry about the loss of Kobe and Gianna, she's grateful for the three daughters who are still with her. Furthermore, she reflects on grief itself, offering her words as support to others. "Mad I’m not with Kobe and Gigi but thankful I’m here with Natalia, Bianka and Capri. I know what I’m feeling is normal. It’s part of the grieving process. I just wanted to share in case there’s anyone out there that’s experienced a loss like this".

See Vanessa Bryant's full post on her emotional grief here, along with the sweet highlight video she shared!